Has it been a month since my last post already? Holy crap! Guess I need to get off my (none-too-small) ass and get back to blogging.....
Happy 4th from the Fat Guy, and here's a few tips for the big day....
1. Remember kids: The fuse points TOWARDS you. You want to make sure the blowing-up-end faces the other way. Just saying....
2. Also, if you're going to walk around with firecrackers in your back pocket, don't swing your arms with a lit punk.
3. On this day, anyway, the ladies are right: BIGGER IS BETTER. At least where it comes to fireworks, anyway.
4. Your dog (or cat, or whatever the hell you've got as a family pet) is NOT a fireworks target. Don't make me come head slap you.
5. On that note, please keep a close eye on the pets today. Don't know about yours, but mine lose their shit (literally and figuratively) when they hear the booms.
Last, but certainly not least.....
6. Make sure you understand WHY we've got this holiday. It's because brave men and women have the stones to go out there and stand up to the bad things in the world to make sure we've got the right to get drunk as hell, burn the bbq, and blow shit up.
God Bless America.
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